First Weigh-In

I survived the first weigh-in. In fact, I was quite surprised and proud of myself. To be honest, I wasn't expecting great results after Friday. I did talk to Travis a little bit last night after my last post and felt better after talking to him. He basically helped me realize that there are going to be times when I'm just going to have to make the best choice possible and enjoy it instead of feeling guilty and letting it bring me down. He usually talks some sense in to me and helps me look at things from a better perspective. I so appreciate that. One of the many, many things I love about my husband. Anyway, eating today went well. I wouldn't say my meals were as frequent as they should be and some didn't contain both protein and carbs, but it was clean! Like I said before, Sundays are going to be hard. I'd like to eat breakfast soon after getting up but then that'd put my snack right in the middle of church. I attend a wonderful church that I absolutely love and I'm sure no one would care but I don't really want to pull a meal out of my purse during the service. Then there's lunch with family. Again, my options are limited. Then I have to try to fit my dinner in before we go back to church at 6:00 in the evening. We typically eat after church. I guess I could eat a snack on the way and do dinner after. I'm going to share a little secret with ya here. Sunday afternoons mean one, and only one, thing to me: nap. I don't care if I got 10 hours of sleep the night before. I love my Sunday afternoon naps. And typically I nap up until it's time to start getting ready for church. I'm not sure I'm willing to cut into sleepy time to eat a meal that I could easily eat afterwards. But I don't really want to come home and prepare a big meal at 7:30 at night. I'm going to have to figure something out. Anyway, I want to share one more thing before I get to my weigh-in. Trav and I went fishing this afternoon and what a beautiful day to do so! Sure it was a little warm when we were sitting out in the sun for a long period of time, but when we got in the shade and once the sun set the weather was perfect! After many failed attempts to catch a fish I decided to read a book that a friend had recommended to me a while back. I bought it several months ago and read through the first couple of chapters but haven't touched it in quite some time. I felt like now was the time to read it. It's called Made to Crave by Lysa Terkeurst. The cover says, "Satisfying your deepest desire with God, not food." That's a pretty good summary of the book and perfect for me! I have allowed food and my love for it to consume way too much of my time, thoughts...my life. That might sound crazy but I'm constantly thinking of food...how I shouldn't be eating so much of it! I've tried to explain the constant battle that rages in my head to Travis before but I don't think he understands because it's not much of a concern for him. I feel like I always struggle with wanting junk food and wanting to be healthy and in shape. I can't have both and it stinks. I'd love to be one of those girls who can eat anything I want and look amazing in a bathing suit. But the harsh reality is that I'm not one of those girls and never will be. If I want to feel good about my body and be comfortable in my clothes, I have to make some changes in my eating habits. Sure, that cookie may taste good for a minute but that's just it. The satisfaction of eating that cookie is temporary. It's short term. The way I feel about myself and how comfortable I am in my own skin...long term. Is that cookie really worth me feeling like crap about myself day in and day out? No. No it's not. Don't get me wrong. I love me some cookies. Let me re-phrase that. I love the taste of cookies. The fact that they love to dwell in my mid-section...don't love. So what I'm learning from this book is that this journey is more about gaining self-control. Being in control of my food instead of the other way around, which is how it has been for far too long! There are lots of good things I've learned from this book so far. I still have a little over half of it to read, but I'm very thankful that I have it at this point in my life. And thank you Malinda for suggesting it! Ok, now for the moment you've all been waiting for: the weigh-in results. When I stumbled out of bed this morning I thought, "Today is the day." Although I really don't care so much about the numbers on the scale as I do about the number on my jeans tag, it can be a good indicator of how you're doing. It can also be a crappy indicator of how you're doing. If the number is up or maybe not down as much as I'd like, it may be water weight or maybe I've gained some muscle. But since the number was down, more than I was expecting, I'll just chalk it up to my hard work this week! So after one week of eating clean probably about 90 or more percent of the time, I lost a total of 4.4 pounds! I was very happy with that number! But I don't want to put too much significance on the number on the scale because there will be a week where I'll work my butt off and do awesome everyday but the scale won't reflect that. And when that happens, I do not want to let it bring me down. So while I am happy with my weight loss I am even more proud of my efforts this week! THAT is what I'm going to rejoice in. I'm going to close with a quote from the book.

"We were made for more than excuses and vicious cycles. We can taste success. We can experience truth. We can choose to stay on the path of hard work and perseverance. We can build one success on top of another. We can keep 'made for more' at the top of our minds and on the tips of our tongues. And our eating habits can be totally transformed as we keep asking, embrace our true identity, find the deeper reason for claiming that identity, and operate in the hope and power that's like no other."